Have Faith
by IrideonthePURPLEbus
Summary: If you read, review it. common courtesy. After coming back to hogwarts two years later, Severus is still wrapped up in the death of Dumbledore. But the return of an old friend seems to take his mind off things.
1. Midnight Mass

**Have Faith**

Part One:

**Midnight Mass**

As the large, gothic school quieted down for the final time that year, Severus Snape slowly made his way over to his living quarters. His steps echoed along the long corridor, and as he passed, he flicked open Dumbledore's old lighter, so that the light of the flames followed him down to his room. Now every torch in the dungeons was out.

The large black grandfather clock in the corner chimed midnight just as he closed the door, taking an old fashioned, jinx-proof key and sticking it in the lock, not bothering to take it out. A sigh so heavy it seemed to carry the world escaped his lips as he tore off his cloak and vest, and undid the white shirt underneath. He fished around for a gray button-up muggle shirt, quickly exchanging the white one for this one. Then, he picked up a jade rosary from the table and with a bang, was gone.

* * *

Nearly two hundred miles away, in a relatively unknown town, a rather normal looking Snape emerged from the shadows of the town church, joining the miniscule amount of people, all night-owls, going to midnight mass. Apparently, his new potion was working. A few people had a mauve colored aura around them: Witches and wizards. He couldn't help but smile with satisfaction, an odd sight, before his normal frown returned, and he blended into the crowd.

Preferring to stick with his better acquainted, he sat himself down between a young warlock with a purple wristband and an earring in his left ear, and an old granny witch, who snuck a sandwich out of her purse halfway into mass. After communion, while everyone else kneeled on the bench and prayed, Severus knelt there and thought. He didn't really believe in Christianity, Catholicism, and all that. In fact, he was an atheist, as were most other wizards he'd met. But after he'd killed Dumbledore, he felt the need to do..._something_...to relieve his guilt, although it was Albus himself who ordered Snape to do it, what with the unbreakable oath and everything. Snape had told him he would gladly break the oath and die, but he had forbade it. He would never forgive him for that, and he would never forgive himself for obeying Albus Dumbledore one too many times.

He clutched the rosary in his pocket, praying to the god he didn't believe in. He knew what he'd do afterwards. He'd apparate around the world for a while, doing whatever, mostly thinking, before apparating back into his own room in time for breakfast. He barely ever slept anymore, and he was grateful that his last request to the former headmaster had been granted; to have his room free of that awful apparition restriction on the rest of that building. Mostly he used that liberty to confer with the death-eaters and such, but now that that part of his history was over, he used it to kill time.

Snape had undergone some serious changes when he came back a year later and explained everything to Headmistress McGonagall. Those old enough to remember the old Snape would recognize that his teaching, always somewhat jaded and spiteful, had nonetheless become worse, as he had seemed to have lost all interest in potions. In truth, that couldn't be farther from the case. When he first returned to teach, McGonagall had offered him the position of Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, but he had declined, thinking it would only remind him more of his slain friend. As it had turned out, everything at the school reminded him of Albus. He did love teaching, a little known fact, but it was taking him longer to adjust than expected.

That night he visted many countries and lands all around the world, each for about half an hour at a time. Some highlights were Egypt, China, Argentina, and Boston, Massachusetts. He apparated back home just in time for the eight o'clock bell to chime, and, almost as if planned, an owl land on his window sill. The Potions professor's eyebrows knit together, creating wavy lines in his forehead. He bent over the owl, a hand hovering over its head, unsure whether to pet it, or throw it back out the window. A normal post owl would just arrive at the Great Hall, so on one hand, whatever letter this owl was carrying might be very urgent, or very private. However, because he'd made so many enemies with death eaters recently, it could just as easily be a trap.

Finally, realizing he could not just stand there all day, and that he had classes to teach (although no one listened on the last day of school), he picked the small, all-black creature off the window sill, and reached for the letter. The message was in a Kelly green envelope, with a slightly darker stamp, depicting a clover and a broomstick. Snape vaguely recognized it as the emblem for the Irish Quiddditch League. He broke the seal and tugged the tinted orange paper out. It blazed with green ink that glittered and gleamed as though it was still wet. It was the expensive stationary kind.

_Dear Mr. Severus Snape, or Prof. Snape, or just Severus_

_I'm sorry, I don't know your official title, but for the matter of this letter, I will call you Severus. I am sure you're not aware, as no one else is but Headmistress McGonagall, that Madame Hooche is announcing her resignation as of today, at the celebration tonight. But listen to me, sounding all formal, I can't stand it anymore, but you have to promise not to tell anyone, Severus! I'm going to be the replacement Quidditch teacher, and Head of Ravenclaw! (the teacher who is current head is resigning as well. That whatsername person...) This will probably all sound really weird to you, Severus, because You probably don't remember me that well, but I sure remember you! We'll both be back at Hogwarts again, just like old times..._

_Well enough rambling...I'm arriving in two days, And I really hope to see you again. God, it's been so long! See you then, Severus._

_Love Always,_

_Silvestra MacMathan_

Snape sat staring at the letter for a long time, breakfast all but forgotten. He knew he had heard that name before, but he couldn't remember where, his thoughts were muddled from lack of sleep and too many years since his adolescence. The murky image of a pale, freckled, pimpled girl with a stick figure frame entered his mind. What he recalled very clearly, though, is that by the time he had graduated, she was only a fifth-year. He blinked. He had no idea what to do. What if she started talking to him about something he didn't remember? She looked like such a fragile girl, too. At least, she had back then.

The clock chimed nine. Snape jumped, scrambled out of the chair tearing off his muggle shirt and donning a clean vest. "Oh bloody fuck, I'll be late!"

* * *

Sylvestra was really pissed. The new beater, Bernie McMahon, just spilt her ink all over her stationary, _and_ her owl, which had just arrived. It wasn't so bad, Toad's feathers wouldn't be stained, but she'd still have to wash him. She was trying to get the poor bird into the sink when Bernie burst in on her, looking drunk. "M' sorry, Sylvy, really I am, I didn't mean to do all tha'...' He said moving up behind her.

She continued struggling with the bird. "That's great, Bernie. Hey--If you went out into the locker room, brought me back a towel, and then walked away—that would be a little slice of heaven." She could hear his hesitation, smell the whiskey on his breath, and feel his drunken amorous feelings all too well.

He tried wrapping his arms around her waist. "Aw, c'mon now, Sylv, no need to be that way. It's enough that we need to start training a new catcher this close to the world cup, no need to be upsettin' us any more..." He said. She could feel his breath on the back of her neck, which meant he was too close.

"Watch your fucking hands, McMahon."

"Oh c'mon...a delicate little flower like you needs someone to proteck her...someone beater...like a strong..." He replied, his arms wrapping tighter around her, his hands falling on a very uncomfortable place.

And suddenly, her elbow connected hard with his rib. Shocked and in pain, the beater staggered back, tripping and falling in the toilet. She whipped around and pressed his head against the wall.

If there's one thing you have to learn about quidditch girls, McMahon, it's to not bleedin' fuck with them. You got it?"

Bernie cringed. She pressed harder.

"I asked you a question, Bernie!"

Bernie slowly nodded. She lifted him up and threw him out of the bathroom. Turning around and smiling sweetly, she said. "Now toad, where were we? Oh yes, your bath..."

**Next episode:**

**Summer!**


	2. Summer!

**Have Faith**

Part two:

**Summer!**

The next two days went by all too quickly for Severus Snape. Before he knew it, forty-eight hours had snuck by him, without leaving him anytime to prepare. The kids all left--as well as the teachers--without incident. The other Professors were all busy arranging vacations, cleaning their classrooms, tedious things that had to be done before the fun; before the summer escape. Snape was one of the few teachers who actually liked the medieval appearance of the school. To him, it was the ultimate vacation, as long as it didn't have obnoxious teenagers.

Snape was surprised at the relief he felt when he heard Filch was fired. He had always just barely tolerated the clingy squib. He had decided, somewhere along the line, that Snape would be his one and only friend other than his beloved cat, which didn't work out too well for Snape. Instead a flighty, spindly looking nymph woman kept the school now. They said she was half house-elf, which would explain the improved condition of the castle, and why she spent extended amounts of time in the kitchens. Her name was Loral, and she had chestnut skin, with bleach blonde hair tied back into two French braids, and the brightest silver eyes. Her ears had a slight elfy kink to them, and her nose was like a ski slope. From time to time Severus would run into her in the hallways, but if he mentioned her to any of the other faculty, they said they barely ever saw her.

The day after the students went home he was out walking the perimeter of the pond, when he heard a small voice call out to him. For a second, he thought it was a school day, and the voice behind him was that of a child's. But as he turned, he was faced with the cherub faced, chestnut skinned she-elf.

"Good day, Severus." She said modestly, averting her eyes. A cloud of thought stormed over the professor's head.

"Loral." Was his simple response as he turned and kept walking. He realized after a few steps that she was not following. He paused, raised a hand, and beckoned her to his side. She scurried forward and fell into step with him, her spidery hands folded over a black apron and a green alice-in-wonderland type dress. He turned his head to look at her as they strolled along.

"Haven't seen you much of late..." He commented, offering the faintest of smiles.

She blushed and looked at her feet. "I've been busy...my job and stuff."

Snape tilted his head a bit more, allowing his eyebrows to knit together for a brief second. "Constantly? Doesn't that get tiring?" He asked, his voice clearly joking.

Loral didn't get it." Oh no, I sleep at nights. And besides, I like my job."

They didn't really progress in the conversation besides that, and so walked along the lake in silence. At first it was akward, but once both of them loosened up a bit, it was quite enjoyable. He even turned to smile at you and saw her looking straight at him, and for the first time, she didn't look away, but looked right back, and smiled.

That night was the first that he had slept peacefully in a long time.

* * *

Snape awoke to a knocking on his door. In a dreary haste, he pulled on a pair of pants and a shirt that could have passed for a normal muggle shirt, if it weren't for the extremely tight arms and sleeves that ran down to his knuckles. He buttoned the shirt up, and started making an attempt to tuck it in, but abandoned that at the second harsh knock at his door.

He turned the key and nearly flung the door open. What he saw stunned him.

"Good morning, Severus. You look well rested," Said an amused voice; one he'd known for the better portion of his life. A voice he'd grown accustomed to hearing ever since the age of eleven.

There stood an extremely silvery, transparent Albus Dumbledore, looking the same as he ever did, and quite a bit happier. As if he could read Severus' thoughts, he held up a finger, and said "I was tired of ageing Severus. I think that is a sufficient answer, and lets leave it at that."

Snape stammered for a second, opening and closing his mouth awkwardly, belying his usual dark coolness. But before Snape could think of saying anything, the ex-headmaster pulled a folded piece of parchment out from the folds of his magnificent robes, and handed it to him.

"A beautiful woman," Albus said, eyeing Severus over his half-moon glasses, "That we are both familiar with, a Miss Sylvestra MacMathan, ex-catcher for Ireland, and a Hogwarts alumnus, asked me to give you this."

And as Severus Snape took the parchment, Dumbledore dissolved into thin air. So the potions master stood there, alone in the doorway, his shirt half tucked in, staring at a ripped up piece of parchment as he held his head in his other hand. Right now he wanted to think of so many things, he wanted to think of Dumbledore. He wanted to feel the emotion sweep over him, the relief of knowing Dumbledore was still there. But as soon as he tried, so came the guilt; it was he that put him in that state either way. It was his fault that Dumbledore, once a man so great, was now so thin a memory that you could stick your hand through him. And so he pushed Dumbledore out of his mind and focused solely on the words in front of him. Two words that were written in shiny green ink in the middle of the parchment.

"_Courtyard. Now."_

As he walked to the courtyard, Severus could feel his heart beating faster and faster. When he saw her, who would she be? What part had she played in his past? In a time so full of pain that he had tried to block it out entirely, yet he could never walk away from (that's why he had taken up the job in the first place), would she be on the good side, With Albus and Lily, or the bad side, with James and Sirius?

No, he was sure of it. With every step closer to her, he became surer. She was definitely on the good side. The murky visions started to become clear pictures. An innocent little girl that for some reason had idolized him. It was common enough for a younger student to cling to an upperclassman, but he never had anyone look up to him. Suddenly that day that James did that...terrible thing...the thing in the memory that Harry had seen...She had been there. Yes, it was clear now. Suddenly he had a flashback to a piece of his life that up until then he forgot had happened.

* * *

_Severus sat there, in the darkest, most discreet corner of the library, knees up against his chest, head buried in his arms to hide the horrible tears of rage and indignation that ran down his pale, sallow cheeks. Five years had gone by and he hadn't made a friend last for more than a year before he lashed out at them, alienating himself from anybody from fourth-year up, who thought him a laughingstock. Anybody third-year and below was scared of him already. Let them be scared. Wasn't fear just a form of respect? So that meant he was respected._

_As he was silently making a pact never to be close to anyone ever again, (Respect was better than friendship anyway) a cool hand clasped his._

_Catching him unaware, she was able to pry his hands away before he went on the defensive. He sat there, staring into a frowning, ghostly face, framed by hair redder even than Arthur Weasley's._

_Left with nothing else to do, he stared back at her, hoping to make it a point with his eyes that he wished her to die. To his dismay, she just looked at him. Slowly, a thin third-year's hand lifted, touching his jaw, hot and sticky with anger and tears. He pushed her hand away forcefully._

_"Go away, Syl." He barked. To make sure she didn't see any more of his embarrassing face, he covered his eyes with a hand. But then he felt those persistent, frustrating fingers pry it away again. It was like as soon as she touched him, his muscles melted to nothing. Looking at her, into her eyes, he could tell that this young girl's determination would outlast his own, as it always had. He dropped his hands to his side. Unfortunately, he knew when he had lost. So he just glared at her, let her read his eyes. 'Why did you have to see that?' That was all they implored. At the sight of such a heartbreaking stare, Sylvestra suddenly flung herself at him._

_It was so sudden, at first Severus thought she had tripped. And suddenly, there was this girl in his arms, and this girl was weeping. She pressed her face against his, hiding away in the teenager's black locks. Their tears mingled, along with their sorrow. and for once, he felt his sorrow being lifted. Sylvestra had volunteered to share his burden. And although it was not anything he would have done five seconds ago when she had walked up to him, he suddenly wrapped his arms around her and held her tight, thinking that this must be what it's like to have a family._

* * *

And for the second time in three days, Severus Snape, potions master, and former death-eater, smiled. And there she was! He nearly skipped down the steps into the courtyard, his eyes falling on a much different figure than he remembered.

Her eyes were still round, a striking blue, with a sea of freckles and disobedient curls surrounding them. Her smile was that of unbridled joy; the smile that a muggle toddler smiles when he gets his first red fire truck. Her nose was straight, up until the end, where it rounded out and pointed up, almost taking a smile shape by itself. The knobby kneed, awkward looking girl had filled out into a slender, tomboyish woman. She wore muggle clothes; a green polo and blue jeans, and she still carried her entrancing Irish brogue.

And then she lept into his arms. He inadvertently breathed in as she wrapped herself around him, and so he inhaled her scent. Suddenly he wanted to do everything, tell her everything, let her read every nook and cranny of his mind. He had a sudden need to meld their two separate lives into one. But then she pulled away and looked at him, breathless, and said "Severus, I've missed you so much, you'd never imagine"

And he watched in horror as a face, nearly scowling, said. "I know. I have to." His voice sounded emotionless! He wanted to let her know how overjoyed he was!

Her smile faltered. "Severus, is everything alright?" Her hands had fallen to his shoulders, and she kneaded them reassuringly

But it was better for him to suffer his emotions silently to let her get too close, and then have her rip his heart out.

"Yes, everything's fine." He lied, brushing a hand off and turning to walk toward the corridor. She followed after like a beagle puppy; like always. He couldn't help it, and his emotions got the better of him as he turned and smiled at her over his shoulder. "You know, you haven't changed a bit," He said through the quietest of smiles.

She grinned, relief plastered all over her face as she bounced up next to him and grabbed his hand. "You know, I was about to say 'and you've changed so much' but you really haven't. You just put all these walls up." She said, poking him.

He felt his face growing hotter in a flush, before he remembered that this was exactly how she had acted when she was in Hogwarts with him. Did she really expect that their relationship would stay exactly the same, even though both of them had completely matured?

"So. Aren't you going to take me on the grand tour?" she asked, looking at him with those glittering eyes that in the past twenty-four hours, he realized he remembered so well. And now he couldn't get the stupid grin off his face.

"Sure, why not?" And he finally grasped her hand back. At felt amazing to be this close to someone, even if that someone didn't even realize how much this meant to him. Finally, he found a sanctuary where he could get away from it all, if just until he retired to his bed tonight, when every guilty thought came back to his head. He had grown used to constant pain, and so postponing it was almost as good as eliminating it entirely.

It was at that moment exactly, as Snape grasped her hand and their fingers intertwined that Head mistress McGonagall decided to descend the stairs.

**Next episode:**

**Typical Girls**


	3. sleepover

**Have Faith**

Part three:

**Sleepover**

* * *

Author's note: Ok, so I lied, this is not called typical girls. I thought in this chapter, I'd have Loral, McGonagall and Sylvestra meet up and it turns into nightmare world for Snape, but I don't think that it would be good to do that this far into the plot, so it's just...yea...I'm ranting...anyways, I'm sorry, I lied.

* * *

Mcgonnagall's hair had grayed considerably in the past two years, but other than that, she looked exactly the same. Her eyebrows shot up as she saw the Potions master and the new Quidditch master _holding hands_. There was a long deadly pause, in which Severus' newfound confidence was washed away, Sylvestra was confused as to why they had frozen, and McGonagall was plain shocked at the fact that one, Severus was straight, and two, he had already become friendly with the new teacher, while he was barely acquaintances with the rest of them.

"so...Professor Snape...I see you've already met Madame MacMathan," She said curtly, doing her best to keep the awkward smile off her face, "I was just coming to welcome her to the school.

"Well if it's alright, Headmistress, He's already welcomed me, and...Just now we were planning to take a tour about the place..." Sylvestra said, not skipping a beat. She was starting to understand the fragile world Severus had created around himself. She could tell he was grateful as she took over, talking for him, as it seemed he could not.

"Oh I see. Is that so, Severus?" the headmistress asked, inclining her head towards him, the feather on her hat quivering.

He nodded numbly, trying to find his voice, which started out as a croak, then quickly mended itself into its normal milky smooth baritone. "Yes, we were just on our way to the, uh, kitchens, then up to the Ravenclaw wing."

"I see. Well it's good to know that you're in such good hands, Miss MacMathan." She said, putting a particular emphasis on the word 'hands', "I will see you two shortly." And she strode off, her billowing black and violet velvet robes trailing behind her. Sylvestra looked over her shoulder at the headmistress.

"How can she stand to wear that in mid-June?" She asked incredulously.

Severus followed her glance and just shrugged and shook his head. "I have no idea."

* * *

The gargoyle leapt back as the passage to the Slytherin common room opened. "And finally, this is my...Slytherin's common room, but I don't think you'll be spending much of your time here..." He said. He had let go of her hand, and barely glanced at her for the entirety of the tour, thanks to McGonagall. As Sylvestra followed him inside, she felt a slight loss. It was hard to tell if he was just acting like it, or if he really was not that interested in her anymore.

Once inside, he turned around, and said in a voice lacking emotion. "I just brought you in here because I thought we'd like some time to catch up." The way he went on, it sounded as though he was talking to an old business colleague.

They went up through to his quarters, where there was a bedroom, a small kitchen, and a living area, all in one open-walled series of rooms. He sat down in one of the many chairs at the small table, with a wave of his hand pulling another across from him out for her to sit in. He levitated the tea over, and they began to talk.

Again, Snape found himself on guard in front of her. He thought he must seem stupid, switching from friendly and warm, to a plastic manikin in two seconds. It was just...She was just so _different_, it was unnerving. He didn't know how to act around her now. He hoped that soon, she'd answer that dilemma for him.

And suddenly he was smiling again. Sylvestra would've been confused, if she wasn't so relieved.

"...So my story's very boring. But I came here to know more about _you_. Like you said, I haven't changed, so I'm not quite as interesting..."

"You're plenty interesting. Besides...you know what happened..." He said with a tone of regret, "Death-eaters and all that..."

Sylvestra flinched, then leaned in, looking about as if someone might overhear them. "I heard you uh...did the you-know-what to Albus Dumbledore..."

"Strictly under orders from the headmaster himself. Besides. You've seen him wandering the halls, obviously. You sent him to me with that paper. I've stopped trying to understand the man completely...He has more twists and turns in his mind than those labyrinths that muggles make for rats," He said through a cup of tea. She nodded, looking down into hers.

"So it was all a trick, then?" She asked quietly "You were with him all along?"

He nodded somberly. Her disposition changed to that of utter joy, like when she first saw him that day. She rose up out of her chair and walked over to sit on the table in front of him. "I always had a feeling...but I daresay, I had my doubts as well. I feel ashamed now." Her hands drifted to his, and just held them, not trying anything, like playing with his fingers, or anything that she normally did. And because of this, Severus found himself responding.

Before he knew what he was doing, his hands were moving up her arms, around her shoulders, down her back. He was now up out of his chair, standing not two inches away from her. He could smell her breath, sweet, with a hint of Mediterranean spice from the tea. He couldn't help but think that his breath must smell awful. That was truly the thought that occupied his mind when his body decided to kiss her.

It was a splendid surprise to Sylvestra. Secretly, that's all she had been hoping for the entire time, but she hadn't expected it to happen on the first day. Severus pushed her back against the table as he kissed her, nearly climbing on top of her. It was clear from the amount of passion he was showing, that he hadn't felt a woman's touch in a long time...If ever.

She hooked her arms around his neck, hands running through his thick black hair. She remembered dreaming of this moment as a first-year, all the way up to now. This had been her ultimate dream, and it showed through in her love life. Her boyfriends were few and far between, as she held them up to a standard not many other woman did. All the men she dated were too confident, too easy to understand, not challenging enough. Severus Snape was perhaps the only man that she could ever love, unconditionally.

She wanted to let him know that so badly, so she began undoing the buttons of his vest...

* * *

Very early the next morning, at one o'clock exactly, Severus awoke and rolled over to see the bare back of Sylvestra. At first he panicked. What the hell was she doing there? What had he done? For a split second, he couldn't remember, then the images came flooding back to him. He sighed with relief. She had made all the advances, She had consented to all of it. He looked at his hands, trembling, then back at the freckled woman at his side. He found he was short of breath, and that he was sweating. He knew it was stress. This wasn't the first time this had happened. In fact, it had happened that night, the night that he first actually accepted her.

"Sylvestra..." He whispered, looking back to her once more. The feelings, the emotions, they were all there; every single one. Except Guilt. Where was Guilt?

He lied down next to her, running a hand down from her shoulder to her hip, before reaching around and resting it on her abdomen. He was still trembling, and he had a feeling that his hands were very clammy.

His heart skipped a beat when he felt her stir, resting one slender hand on top of his gnarled one, the other reaching back to cup his cheek. He leaned forward, so that his lips just barely brushed against her ear.

"I don't love you..." He whispered, "I adore you. I worship the ground you walk on. I am...your dedicated servant..." And the two slipped back into a deep sleep.


	4. Dawn of the Dogs: Hogsmeade

**Have Faith**

Part four:

**Dawn of the Dogs;**

**Hogsmeade**

---------

author's note

okay, so this is kind of a one-shot, but after I wrote it, I realized it was crucial enough to both the characters of Severus and Sylvestra that it would be better to simply put it in as a flashback or dream sequence. Ergo, you have Have Faith part four. Enjoy!

---------

During that sleep, Severus Snape had a dream. It wasn't exactly a dream as much as it was a flashback. His memories of Sylvestra were coming back to him piece by piece. He dreamt of the first time he had actually talked to Sylvestra as a human being, instead of as a second-year.

* * *

Severus sneered down at the little Irish girl beaming up at him. Her skin was so pale it seemed to glow in the moonlight. It had taken him long enough planning to actually get him out of Hogwarts and into Hogsmeade, and this little girl just rode on his coattails the entire way. It was he who discovered the secret passage in the statue, so why should she get to share in the fun?

"Hi Severus!"

"Bug off, Sylvestra."

"No! I'm going to follow you!"

Severus made a disdainful noise in his throat, before pushing it out through his teeth, turning it into a hiss.

"Why won't you ever let me go with you? Wherever?!" She said as they started off down the barren street."

"Because you're an annoying little prick," He said matter-of-factly, staring straight ahead.

Because of Severus' long, lanky figure, and his obvious age advantage, Sylvestra had to power-walk to keep up with him. "Well having an annoying little prick as a friend is better than having no friends at all!" She blurted, grabbing the hem of his robe.

Severus whipped around, his dark eyes widened, making him look all the more vampiric with the dark circles under his eyes, and the dark hair in his face. Sylvestra was sure he was about to grow fangs and pounce on her. She let go of his cloak and shrank back into the shadow of a nearby building.

"What did you say?!" The fourth-year hissed as he and bent down, staring her in the face, so close, he could smell the pumpkin juice still on her breath. He ripped the cloak off his shoulders, letting it fall to the ground. It didn't make him seem any more impressive. In fact, it made him less impressive. With the cloak gone, one could see how narrow and bony his shoulders were, and how loosely his uniform, already a size small, fit him.

Sylvestra shivered a bit, in part because she forgot her cloak and her breath was starting to cloud, but mostly because of the dead chill in Snape's eyes. Nevertheless, she stood by what she said.

"I said isn't it better to have one extremely annoying, understanding friend, then no friends of any sort?" She asked again, a hint of defiance in her tone.

And what followed could only be described as a staring contest; those silly things that every child played at one point in their life, and that every child laid off playing by their eighth birthday. It was more complicated than that of course. It was a sort of battle of wills. And, as history is doomed to repeat itself, Sylvestra's will won over Severus'.

"What the fuck kind of excuse is that?" Mumbled the fourth-year, as the twelve year old skipped along beside him, "When I was your age, Sylvestra, I couldn't stay up past midnight if I wanted to..." He lied. Of course, he had heard others say that, so he thought it must've been the norm. He had always been nocturnal. Now if only the rest of the world could follow his example. It was much more efficient his way.

The young girl looked up at Severus Snape with unmasked adoration in her eyes. It was some miracle that he wasn't looking her way; he had just averted his eyes a second ago.

"An excuse."

"Yea. Your excuse is that you pity me because I have no friends?"

"It's not an excuse, and it's not pity."

"Well, for your information, I _choose_ to have no friends. And what is it, if it's not pity, oh wise sage?" He drawled sarcasticly, having acquired the detestable, malignant habit from Lucius Malfoy, sort of a role model for the younger Severus.

"I don't know, maybe sympathy?" She shot back, returning his dripping sarcasm with pained venom. Up until that moment, Severus forgot he was dealing with a second-year. "Maybe I know what it's like to be alone? Maybe this Ravenclaw is tagging along with a Slytherin because no one else will take her..."

Her voice sounded strong, but from her eyes, which refused to look at him, he could tell she was hurt. But something in this equation didn't add up; She looked like the poster-child for a twelve-year-old popular brat. He hadn't even thought it was possible that this girl didn't have any friends. Something about her charisma reminded him of Lily. Maybe that was why he hated her so much; It was like a miniature Lily mocking him, never letting him forget that he wasn't good enough for her.

"You? How come no one likes you?' He asked as they wandered down the road to his rather unfriendly destination.

"You haven't heard my nickname?" She asked, looking at him, face flushed to a nice beet red.

Severus shook his head innocently. "No, I haven't."

"Well, the rest of the kids, they -- because I -- Severus, I'm a quidditch player. I know, I'm only twelve and stuff, but I've been playing with my family ever since I was five...When I'm in school, all I can think of is quidditch...so...I don't really pay attention. Everyone thinks I'm magically challenged. They call me Sylvestra the Squib..."

For the first time that night, Severus was visibly fazed. "They what?!"

Sylvestra nodded glumly and looked at her feet, kicking a pebble down the cobblestone road. "I knew you wouldn't like it..."

"Sylvestra that's...that's horrible...!"

Sylvestra merely nodded and looked away, to avoid him seeing the flush in her cheeks. For her, it had taken some courage to actually lie to Severus Snape. She justified it by telling herself it wasn't a lie, but just not the whole truth. Although they did make fun of her for her grades, the main reason that no one was her friend was because everyone knew of her 'secret' love for Severus. As well as calling her 'Sylvestra the Squib', they called her 'Sylvestra McSnivellus'.

* * *

As Severus finally came up to the gates of his final destination, Sylvestra's eyes widened and she stopped dead.

"What? Why here, Severus?" She asked as she scrambled away from the gate to the Shrieking Shack, tripping over herself and falling on the hard frosted ground. Severus' first instinct when he turned to her was to pull her up and to ask if she was okay, but he restrained, merely watching her as she picked herself up and wiped the snow off her backside, before he slowly turned his attention back to the house. The clouds were parted just enough here that the full moon shone through the haze, washing the area with a ghostly pale light. The two palest students at Hogwarts suddenly looked like they might disappear into the snow. Severus silently thanked his lucky stars.

After waiting five minutes and hearing nothing, he eased the door open, cringing at the horrible creaking noises it made. A little more hesitant than before, Sylvestra followed, shivering as she trudged her way through a heavy onset of new snow, adding to the week old, two foot deep powder. In Hogsmeade, everywhere else the snow had been cleared, but no one dared go close enough to the shrieking shack to actually do something about it.

Because of the differences in uniforms, Severus made somewhat faster progress. Sylvestra was getting slower by the minute, her legs only protected by the translucent stockings, her skirt coming down to mid-thigh. Over the course of the night, she had been developing a steady cough, and halfway down the long, embarrassingly winding path, she faltered and fell to her knees, too proud to call out for Severus' help.

She was lucky that, not five minutes later, Snape turned back to comment on the girl's quietness, and noticed she wasn't there. Within seconds, he was sprinting up the hill to where she had dropped, a worried expression on his face.

"Sylvestra!" He called, not sure if she was conscious. He was greeted by a fit of coughing.

"Oh Sylvestra, I'm so sorry. Why didn't you tell me?" He asked, continuing to verbally kick himself as he wrapped his cloak around her and picked her up in his arms. But instead of heading back to Hogwarts, like he knew he should have, he turned around and continued towards the shack, some unforeseen burning desire pushing him onward.

Then, when he was not ten feet from the door, an earsplitting, horrifying, shrieking howl pierced the night. Severus froze, staring straight ahead at the doorknob. He felt a rustling near his chest and something like an ice cube press against the inside of his arm. Sylvestra had pressed her face in the crook of his arm, her nearly frostbitten nose against the thin starched material.

He took a cautious step or two forward, then reached his hand out, unsure if it was really the right thing to do. The young girl weighed heavily on his conscience. He was responsible if anything happened to her in there. But he needed to know if his theory was right, if Lupin was...

"Go in..." Came a hoarse whisper.

Severus looked down. "What?"

"Go on, I can tell you really want to. Go ahead and go in," Sylvestra said, glancing up at him, "And you can put me down now."

He quickly put her on her feet, but didn't bother to take the cloak from her. Everything seemed to go in slow motion for a moment. Sylvestra stood stock still, watching as Snape itched toward the door. He turned the knob, and pulled it an inch away from the threshold.

As soon as he did so, there was that same shriek, and through the gap in the doorway, he could see a furry gray mass lurching toward him. He tried to shut the door hurriedly, but the monster slashed through it. Grasping nothing but a brass knob, Severus fell back, trying to scramble away in the snow, to no avail. He could do nothing but watch in horror as the creature came toward him. As it thrust its head towards his neck, going in for a lethal bite, he saw a hand, seemingly come out of nowhere, grab the beast by its ear, and tug hard. The werewolf hesitated, then howled, turning to the owner of such a pale, delicate hand. Sylvestra gulped and started back.

The beast crouched down onto all fours, slowly approaching her, like a cat does a cornered mouse, knowing it has already won. Hurriedly, Severus fished around in his robes for his wand. No. That would take to long. He searched around and caught the glimpse of a fallen limb, about the size of a leg of lamb. He rose into a crouching position, plucking the branch from the snow and raising it over his head. With one sweep, he clubbed the beast upside the head.

"Go ahead, you bloody little fucker! That's right I hit you! Come after _Me_!!!" Severus snarled, his lips pulled back to reveal jagged teeth, his greasy hair falling in front of his eyes. For the second time that night, Sylvestra thought he might grow fangs and sink his teeth deep into flesh, be it hers, or the werewolf's.

Snape cursed himself. He was going to fight off a werewolf with a piece of wood?! Yeah right. But all that was running through his head was a way to get the beast away from the little second-year. He swung the branch at it like its head was a bludger. The beast just kept ducking and dodging, getting closer to him with each swing. Then he tried a thrust, bashing the end of the limb forcefully into the beast's abdomen. It let out a cry half way between a scream and a roar, clearly more enraged then it was hurt. It slashed out, destroying the damp tree branch and a good portion of Severus' arm in one swipe.

The boy cried out in pain, grasping his wound and looking up at the beast, his face a mix of anguish and resignation, but no fear whatsoever.

Then there came a barking. The beast stopped and turned, so did Severus. What he saw only made his heart fall more: A large black dog. Because of his studies he knew it was the grim. He moaned in despair. Not so much for his own life. He didn't care much for it anyway. He moaned because he made a fellow student, and his first...friend...if you could call her that, die.

But then there was no grim. In the blink of an eye, there stood Sirius, in the dog's place. He pointed his wand at the large beast, and roared "_INCARCEROUS!"_

Out of nowhere, ropes shot out and bound the werewolf were it stood, one particular rope so clever as to even wrap around the beasts muzzle. Severus stood there blinking, merely looking at the fellow seventh-year. The Sirius turned his attention to him, and all Snape could see was pure, unbridled rage in the boy's eyes.

"GO!!" He roared, and with a flick of his wrist pointed his wand to the pallid boy. Severus hurried back, glancing at Sylvestra who was already up and running toward him. Using his vest as a sling, he scrambled to join her, and the two never stopped sprinting until they got back to Honeyduke's basement, and the trap door that led back to school. It was only then, when they stopped running, that Snape realized he still clutched the doorknob.


	5. Ginormous, Incredibly large, and

**Have Faith**

Part five:

**Ginormous, Incredibly Large and Grandiose Amounts of Love**

**Disclaimer: Really? Is it that confusing to you that I have to put a disclaimer in? I mean, I think you'd know by now that some random girl doing fanfic does NOT own any small part of Harry Potter. If I did, my stories would be in print, and they wouldn't be considered FANFICS now, would they?**

When Severus awoke again, the sun was shining brightly through the thin slit of a window, the narrow golden beam landing directly over his unfortunate eyes, so when he woke up, he was temporarily blinded by the sun. He groaned and rolled over, his hand falling on an empty pillow. He paused, then looked to his side. The pale figure that had so recently filled the empty space in his bed, was now gone.

With a shock he sat up, his greasy hair sticking to the back of his neck and his cheek on one side. His right leg was asleep, having fallen off the side of the bed during the night. The left was mercilessly tangled among the sheets, making a sort of cast that ran up to mid-thigh.

After fighting with it for one seemed like an eternity, Severus freed himself from the sheet rather forcefully, his momentum carrying him halfway across the room to land on the still tea-laden table. He rushed to pull on the nearest robes, and in his haste out the door, failed to see the note on the table.

_Severus,_

_Professor flitwick has requested to lunch with me. Well, brunch, as the case may be. I won't be too long, but just incase, don't wait up for me. Sorry I didn't wake you up, but you looked so tired and peaceful and dreamy and...anyway, I'll surely be back before dinner. I hope you can entertain yourself until then..._

_Ginormous, incredibly large and grandiose amounts of love,_

_Sylvie_

**

* * *

Obviously, the first place Severus thought to go was the quidditch field. Of course it made sense that she would go there. She would probably like to scope it out, maybe take an experimental fly, he didn't know. The word _fly_, which used with any other human, magic or non magic, had a different effect. When he thought _human_ and _fly,_ he usually thought broomsticks. But with Sylvestra, he had to run that sentence over in his head twice.**Obviously, the first place Severus thought to go was the quidditch field. Of course it made sense that she would go there. She would probably like to scope it out, maybe take an experimental fly, he didn't know. The word , which used with any other human, magic or non magic, had a different effect. When he thought and he usually thought broomsticks. But with Sylvestra, he had to run that sentence over in his head twice. 

Suddenly, he had the urge to spread his wings as well. Wings, filled with sorrow as they may be. And even though there was no rain in sight, He was so ready to. So ready to free himself from such conformity as this human body that had brought him so much shame that he was actually halfway there when someone cleared their throat, their voice aged and prim.

"Why Severus," Minerva McGonagall said, quickly shifting from her cat form and adjusting the spectacles on her nose before continuing to speak again, "I'm surprised. Eighteen years? Eighteen years and you never told anyone?"

Severus Snape quickly sucked in the feathers, turning slowly around and trying not to sweat. Well, he supposed if anyone besides Albus was to know about this, it should be an ex-transfiguration teacher and fellow animagus. Still, he felt he couldn't hate anyone any more than McGonagall right then.

"So, What is it?" She asked, her hands clasped firmly behind her back. "That was a bird wasn't it. A raven, or a grackle. No, they're both too small..." Snape cringed. It was like she was taunting him. "maybe a condor, or a cormorant? Something black...or green." Headmistress McGonagall smirked. It was obvious she was having fun, enjoying her newfound perks of being headmistress.

"Or maybe it's a..."

"It's an augurey!" Severus snapped, turning back around and looking at the spotless sky, "I mean, my animagus is an augurey, Madame." Damnit, couldn't there just be a speck of rain?

"I see. So I'm assuming you're..."

"Registered? Yes. And I have been for fifteen years."

"I...see."

"I've been an animagus for twenty-one." He said with a grudging smile.

This smart little comment got him a stern glance from Professor McGonagall. They stood, side by side, his black robes contrasted by her emerald green, and the brighter, lighter green of the fresh-cut stadium grass. Both their hands were locked sternly behind their backs, and it seemed neither was going to look at one another all day. But then a smile, albeit a prickly one, formed from Professor McGonagall's lips.

"I see you took your time filling out the ministry's forms. You are quite an interesting character, Severus. Although I know you had a few quarrels with Potter and his friends in your day," She said, "You are more alike than you realize."

Severus remained silent. There were few people in the wizarding world he liked, and McGonagall was not one of them, but two things kept him from outright loathing her. One, she was the headmistress, and if there was one thing he had learned, being careful around those in higher positions was more often than not a good move. Two, He respected Minerva McGonagall. She was an efficient enforcer of rules, she knew how to keep a classes attention, and was an intelligent spell caster herself, this being a skill that increasingly few carried as time went on. He could count the idiots away on his fingers.

"For instance, you both share, or shared an interest in Professor MacMathan," She continued, once again pulling her lips taught in order to smirk.

"As I understand, Remus and she were somewhat of an...item in his later years, weren't they?"

"...yes, I suppose so." Snape responded through gritted teeth. He wished she hadn't reminded him of that little bit of history.

"I sent for her last night, but she wasn't in her room." The old woman's eyebrows went up. "You don't know where she could've gone, do you Severus?" She inquired, trying to sound as innocent as possible, and failing miserably.

"Not the slightest idea." He retorted, turning to lock in a stare with Minerva, giving his famous penetrating glare. She fired back with a look of triumph. Like it or not, she had guessed where Sylvestra had been, and correctly too. But she didn't have to know that.

"Did you try the Quidditch field?"

"What? Here? Outside?"

"Yes, as I recall she had quite a fancy for the game. And she _was_ the outdoorsy type."

"You know I never thought of that..."

"Wow, I didn't expect you two to be here!"

Both of them whirled to see the bright eyed Sylvestra beaming at them, wearing quidditch boots, black velvet britches with a matching skirt and shirt, a pale blue vest and a cloak of the same color. Her hair was tied back in a tight braid.

"By the way, Sevy, dear," She said. Snape winced, not daring to look anywhere in Minerva's general direction. "This morning I caught sight of a doorknob without a door. It was on your table. Could it be the one from your fourth year?" A smile played at her lips. Her lipstick made them an icy color, just like her cloak and vest.

"Yes, it could." He said hurriedly, as though it pained him. Before she had the opportunity to address the headmistress, he ushered her over to a spot just out of earshot.

"Are you crazy? What are you doing?! Where have you been for the past four hours?"

"Am I crazy?" She frowned. "Look, I can't help it if you get up three hours later than me, but the least you could do is read the notes I leave you. I was at Flitwick's, discussing things."

"Things, things like what?"

"You're getting off the point, Severus! What do you _mean_ what am I doing, I'm talking to you!"

"Professor McGonagall is right there!" Severus hissed, barely resisting the temptation to point dramatically in her direction."

"Oh, I see...that's what it is, isn't it?" Sylvestra said, calming down some.

"Wait, what's what it is?' He realized he would have probably preferred it if she had stayed mad at him.

Sylvestra actually grinned at that point. "You don't want anyone to know how close we are. It'll ruin your reputation as the reclusive little potions master."

"No, that's not it at bloody well all! I just think it's unprofessional to—!"

He had to cut off, because suddenly her lips were on his. His eyes widened helplessly. At that small moment in time, one thought ran through his head: Fuck. Well, we're screwed now, aren't we?

Sylvestra mumbled something through his tongue. He looked confusedly down at her. She seemed frustrated, but broke away quickly to mumble "Put your arms around my waist," Before locking lips again.

Too bewildered to even remember where he was, he obeyed, leaning back heavily on his heels so as not to overbalance. Slowly, he realized this thing they were doing was kissing. As his brain still worked in slow motion when it came to romance, he didn't realize the headmistress was also standing not twenty feet away. His arms wrapped tighter around her and he closed his eyes.

When they finally broke away, she smiled and stepped back, putting her hands on her hips. "Now, don't you go anywhere," Sylvestra said, "I'm going to go and get my broomstick. Be back in a jiff!"

It was only as she was walking away, bouncing on her heels happily and probably humming a tune to herself, did the full magnitude of what just happened wash over Snape. He stood there, horrified, staring at a patch of ground as McGonagall walked up to him with one of those 'Oh really, as you were saying?' expressions on her face. Severus might've shot back with a 'shut your mouth' expression, but he seriously thought he was too horrified to function properly at the moment.

"Quidditch field indeed." She said with barely masked vindication. "Well, Severus, I have lots of work to catch up on. Don't let me keep you and Miss Sylvestra." She turned, walked about ten feet, then turned again and said "By the way, Severus, you have a little blue on the left," Tapping her finger to the corner of her mouth.

* * *

"But what I don't understand is why you had to go and do _that_," Severus sighed, kneading his face with his knuckles to relieve the tension.

Sylvestra ran her fingers gently through his hair, sitting next to him. The sun was setting, so she had decided to finally come in for a rest, and possibly dinner. She had not only gone for a leisurely fly, but went through all her exercises and training routines, so by the time she had landed, she was quite sweaty.

"What? Kiss you? ...Remind me why I wore velvet again?"

"I don't know," He said moodily, sounding a lot like a teenager, "You're the one who picked out your wardrobe."

Sylvestra sighed, putting a hand on Snape's knee and wrapping her arm around his bony shoulders. "Why did I do that? ...Well why not? You certainly couldn't get in trouble; it's not like they'd sack you for kissing another teacher...unless it was McGonagall herself...hold on...your not cheating on me with her are you?" She asked, trying to cheer him up by joking. He had apparently lost his sense of humor, though. Sylvestra grumbled to herself and continued. "Besides, I think it would just make the situation worse to hide it until one day it all gets blown away, and she walks in on us doing it."

"Oh god, ew!" Severus hid his eyes in his hand and cringed. "I don't want to think about that."

She laughed. "Well then, there you go! So we both agree it _is _better!"

He had to laugh. He hated it because she had a point. "Yea, I guess you're right, but why...?"

She put a finger over his lips, smiling softly. "Why didn't I discuss it with you? Well it's obvious you would've said no either way...and if you vetoed it and I still did it, I knew I'd be in deep shit."

He raised an eyebrow. "And you thought this all out before you kissed me."

"Well...no," She admitted, smiling sheepishly, "But they're good reasons, aren't they?"

Severus shook his head resignedly. "I will _never_ understand you."

"I'm hungry."


	6. Why He Created Sectumsempra

**Have Faith:**

Part six:

**Why He Made Sectumsempra**

_A/n: Ok, this is the longest chapter I have EVER written, but I kinda got into a groove, so...yea. From now on, all of the flashbacks will be in Italics, seeing as it seems stupid to introduce them as flashbacks and ruin the mood, and every single one of them is important to the present story. Whoever's flashback it is will be centered over the segment. Also, if you don't recognize terms I use, look them up in the online Harry Potter lexicon. Okay, I'm done now. Enjoy the chapter_

"Appleby Arrows."

The gargoyle leapt aside. Sylvestra looked at it warily. In her seven years attending Hogwarts School, she had been this way twice, both times with Albus Dumbledore standing between her and the giant stone beast. She laughed at herself inwardly and told herself it was a foolish child's fear. But she still felt her adrenaline rise slightly as she walked past the gargoyle, which upon hearing the right words, sprung to life, its eyes glowing with a swirling red and silver mist.

Well, Headmistress McGonagall _had_ said in her acceptation letter that she was allowed to ask any question she needed to feel more at home here... Still, Sylvestra had a disquieting sensation in her stomach that she had never felt even on the quidditch field.

She took a deep breath, and raised a hand, grabbing hold of the large brass knocker and pulling it back, intent to make sure that she could be heard through the thick doors.

"Ah, but isn't it romantic, Minerva! Two students, fated to be together since Severus' third year (that was Sylvestra's first, mind you) reunited at last," Said a jubilant voice, followed by a chuckle. "I always knew they were going to find there why back to each other, _Headmistress_."

Sylvestra screeched to a halt mere millimeters away from the door. She frowned, knowing what she was about to do was not right, but knowing she could not stop herself either way. She hesitated, and then pressed her ear hard against the door, one hand stretched out for balance, the other still on the knocker.

"Yes, I suppose so. It appears they've been reduced to lover's quarrels already. You should have seen them at the quidditch field, Albus. At first I thought they were merely bickering friends, but then...well..." McGonagall trailed off, and Sylvestra could almost feel her trying to change the subject. It was obvious, aged as the headmistress was, that she was uncomfortable with such topics. Sylvestra grinned. Professor McGonagall had always been this way, she remembered fondly, her mind going back to the dancing lessons for the Yule Ball in her sixth year.

Then there was that little amused chuckle again. "I know, it's hard to believe they were once our students..." The ghost of Albus Dumbledore suddenly cut off.

"Wait Albus, where are you..."

Quite unexpectedly, not a foot away from where she had her ear pressed, The silvery-blue Dumbledore emerged from the solid oak door. There was an awkward moment, in which, unsure, Sylvestra smiled.

Dumbledore looked at her over his spectacles, smiling the way an owner might when they catch their kitten doing something bad, yet inevitably cute.

"Good evening, Miss MacMathan, I trust wherever Severus is, he's well aware of _your_ location." He said, His eyes glinting.

Sylvestra laughed nervously. "Well, about that..."

Dumbledore tsked disapprovingly, before sticking his head back through the door. "You have a visitor, _Headmistress_!"

Syvlestra jumped back hurriedly as she heard footsteps coming toward the door. Albus chuckled one more time before dissolving into nothingness, just before the door opened, to see a slightly surprised Professor McGonagall.

"Can I help you, Sylvestra?"

Sylvestra was already a deep shade of scarlet as she followed McGonagall into the office. It was one thing to kiss Snape _in front_ of McGonagall, but to actually talk to her about this thing she was about to...was purely horrifying. And as Minerva took her seat behind her desk, she had a sudden fleeting burst back to the past, back to her favorite class in Hogwarts.

* * *

_Sylvestra_

_Outside the icicles on the trees were just beginning to melt. By her third year, Sylvestra had learned to pry herself from the window just long enough for lessons, granted it was easier during the winter._

_"Today class, we will be discussing...yes discussing, not much magic today," Professor McGonagall said to her class as they moaned, putting away their wands. "As I said, today we'll be discussing animagi."_

_Sylvestra's head snapped to the front of the class, eyes widening as McGonagall's gaze swept over the children. Sylvestra's weird stare was silently taken note of. The girl never paid _that_ much attention._

_"Now, can anyone tell me what an animagus is?"_

_The entire classroom seemed taken aback as Sylvestra MacMathan's hand shot up in the air. _

_"Well, well, Ms. MacMathan?"_

_"An animagus is a witch or wizard who can transform into an animal at will. They retain the brain and willpower of themselves in human form, unlike werewolves, and so have control over their actions. Furthermore, they do not have a choice of what animal they change into, and it is very difficult and very dangerous to become one, because it is a very complicated form of transfiguration."_

_"Very good!" Said Professor McGonagall, trying to subdue the incredulous tone in her voice "Ten points to Ravenclaw! It's nice to see you finally paying attention, Ms. MacMathan."_

_Sylvestra turned an alarming shade of pink and looked down at her parchment. The professor looked out over the rest of her class, continuing with her lecture. "Yes, Ms. MacMathan is absolutely right. An animagus is someone who has mastered the ability to transform into an animal, like so..."_

_And there, where their transfiguration teacher had so recently stood, was a tabby cat, slightly graying around the muzzle, and silver spectacle marks around her eyes. The cat remained long enough for people to gasp and gawk, and then turned back into their teacher. She went on talking as if nothing had happened, and the sudden outburst of whispering stopped almost as soon as it started._

_"However, as Ms. MacMathan said, an animagus cannot change into any animal it wishes. Depending on the person's personality, the animal they change into is fixed, and almost always the same as their corporeal patronus, which you will be learning about this year in Defense Against the Dark Arts..."_

_Sylvestra frowned, her mind sliding easily out of focus. This was all stuff she already knew. What was the point of paying attention if it didn't get her anywhere? Her head turned to the window outside again. It would be nice feel the cool air on her skin. She couldn't wait until break..._

_"We had an interesting transfiguration class today..." She said, her feet dangling below her as she sat on the wall at the edge of the courtyard. Severus had cleared a patch in the snow below her and sat there, unwrapping a bunch of chocolate frogs._

_"Really?" He asked, not very interested, but deciding to give her the benefit of the doubt. Some of her stories could be quite entertaining._

_"Yea..." She beamed down at him. "Guess what it was about?" her smile took a more mischievous turn, and she jerked a thumb over to a willow tree downhill, where four fifth-years stood, one playing with a snitch, two others watching him, and a third leaning against a tree, his nose deep in a book._

_Severus' heavy brow furrowed for a moment, before his eyes widened in realization. "Animagi?!" He asked, His lip curling into a smirk as he reached a hand up, passing a chocolate frog to her._

_She munched on it gleefully. "Yup. Did I ever tell you?" She said, not really biting the frog as much as she let it melt in her mouth. Severus had stashed them in the snow overnight. They didn't hop about when they were frozen._

_"Tell me what?" He asked as he looked at his trading card from different angles. "Laverne de Montmorency..." he whispered to himself, reading the name underneath the picture of a blonde haired veela-like woman smiling through a steamy pink mist that billowed from a potion bottle. Severus paused and looked again from a different angle. Without her face obscured by the smoke, she was a pockmarked, raggedy looking hag, her skin a sickly shade of green._

_"I'm an Abraxan..." The girl said absentmindedly. "Ew, Glover Hipworth...I have about five of him, do you have anything to trade?"_

_"Are you kidding, I wouldn't trade anything for him, he's one of the most common...Hold on, you're a _what_?!"_

_Sylvestra blinked, scooting to the left of him and sliding down the wall, making sure her cloak was under her so her skirt wouldn't get wet. She was now sitting beside him, resting her head on his shoulder. Severus was too surprised to even shrug her off like he normally did._

_"Yea, I'm an animagus, I have been since I was like... well, everything in my mind is compared to quidditch, and I became an animagus shortly after I started, so about six, yea...I've been one since I was about six." She said, as though it wasn't any big deal. Severus obviously didn't feel the same way._

_"Is everybody here an animagus except me?" He growled, stacking his books and replacing them in his bag huffily._

_"Oh, I would highly doubt that, that would be a _lot_ of unregistered animagi." She said, looking up at the sky, not really noticing the dark tone that Severus took._

_Severus stood up abruptly, flung his bag over his shoulder and started down the hill, not looking back. Sylvestra stood still, frozen with shock a moment, then scrambled down after him, kicking up a great deal of snow in her haste._

_"Severus wait!" She called after him. The four boys by the willow tree looked up. She grabbed his sleeve when she finally caught up with him, her cheeks and knees turned raw with the chill. She had lost her cloak some way down the hill, and so hugged herself to keep from getting to cold._

_Severus tried not to smile triumphantly as he turned to look at her with what he hoped was a furious expression on his face. Yes, he was mad at her for not telling him, but he'd found over the past year that he could never hold a grudge against her. It was just in her nature to be scatterbrained, and once she realized she'd done something wrong, she'd go to the ends of the earth to try and make it right. It was a wonder she had not been put in Hufflepuff._

_"Severus I'm sorry, what'd I do?" She asked, searching his eyes for an answer._

_"What did you do? What did you do?! Nothing except completely obliterate the trust I thought we had for one another!" He said, keeping his voice to a hiss so that no one would overhear them. Sylvestra didn't quite do the same_

_"What? Well, I can't help it! I didn't think it'd make much difference in how you thought about me!"_

_"I can't believe you didn't tell me! I know you must be unregistered, but that's no reason!" Snape wondered to himself whether he should end the fight by storming away and leaving her to brood for a few hours, or if he should be the one to give in._

_"I said I didn't think it was important! Besides, it never came up in a conversation and-"_

_"Well looky here, Padfoot, the old married couple are having a row are they?" Called a voice over Severus' shoulder. He whipped around, his hand going to his pocket automatically, where he kept his wand._

_But James had already beaten him to it, whipping his wand out and pressing it under Snape's pointed chin._

_"Well well, Snivellus," James said, smiling "Looks like I've got the upper hand."_

_"Leave him alone, Potter!" Sylvestra snapped, her hands on her hips. Her wand was stuck in her belt, inches from her right hand and unbeknownst to them._

_Sirius actually laughed right then, tugging on his rumpled tie. "Oh no! Come on Snivellus, are you really that wimpy that you have to hide behind a little third-year girl?" He asked, smirking._

_Enraged, Sylvestra drew her wand and pointed it not five inches from Sirius. A jet of orange sparks flew from the tip and hit him right in the face. At first it seemed like nothing had happened. Sirius blinked away the sparks, and scowled, looking much like the black dog they had seen last year in Hogsmeade. "Why you little-"_

_But then it happened. Sirius had been rubbing his face, the orange sparks having left a stinging sensation, but as he pulled his hand away, a clump of hair came with it. Sirius stared at the coarse blackness in his hand, then slowly, fearfully, grabbed a fistful of hair and tugged. Instead of meeting resistance like one normally would, the hair just fell out. Soon it started to just drop from its place on his scalp, the chunks getting bigger and falling faster as the spell set in. _

_James faltered, torn between helping his friend and punishing his enemy. His hesitation cost him plenty, because soon, there was a ring of black hair surrounding Sirius, a few stray strands clinging to his robes, and none left on his head. Sirius staggered back in horror, his hands running across his smooth head._

_"My...my hair! Its all gone! He said, dropping to his knees and taking fistfuls of the hair on the ground, inadvertently grabbing fistfuls of snow as well. Slowly his horror struck face hardened into a steely mask of raw hatred._

_"You! He snarled, pointing his wand at the girl. "You little bitch, I'll show you! _Asperiscindo!_"_

_Severus' eyes widened. Sylvestra didn't know what that spell was, but it sounded nasty. She cringed and, just to be careful flung her arms over her head. The air in front of Sirius' wand waved and became distorted, like a great deal of heat was shooting from it. Sylvestra closed her eyes, fearing the worst. She knew James would never seriously injure someone, but had never been so sure about Sirius._

_But then she heard a cry that was not her own. She opened her eyes in shock and saw James had fallen back on the ground, his glasses askew, and Severus standing in front of her, blocking the spell. She staggered away to the left so she could see better. Sirius' face was ashen. Apparently he didn't know the effects of the spell either. But then se caught side of Severus' front, and a scream escaped her lips._

_Across Severus' chest were two gashes, each deep enough that they cut almost completely through his ribs and wide enough that it looked more like he had pieces of flesh ripped from him than he had been slashed at. They crossed each other halfway through, making a gigantic bloody 'X'. _

_Severus look down at his front, his face so contorted in pain that it was unrecognizable, then slowly up at Sylvestra, before finally resting his terrified eyes on Sirius, he shuffled forward, apparently trying to get to the Gryffindor boy, before tripping and falling limply to the ground, wasting no time in turning the snow around him scarlet. The two boys still by the tree ran over. Peter Pettigrew had an eager, almost hungry look in his eyes, and Remus' face was etched with lines of worry._

_"Padfoot, what'd you do?" He whispered._

_Remus' words seemed to make something click together in Sylvestra's mind. It was Sirius that had done this to him. It was all Sirius fault..._

_Without knowing it, she stood up and walked very calmly over to the now bald boy, then exploded, trying her best to knock him senseless. She didn't even know what words she was shrieking, but she knew there were red hot tears flowing down her face, and all she wanted to do was beat him to a pulp. By the time James and Remus had managed to restrain her, Sirius was sporting a hefty black eye and a split lip, among another nasty looking marks. They had managed to restrain her just in time, too, because at that moment a tall harsh looking figure in black and grey robes appeared over the hill._

_"What's going on? I heard screaming." Madame hooch called, looking about at the group, frowning at one of her favorite students, who was now trying to attack another. Then her hawk-like eyes focused on Snape, and she gasped in horror._

_The entire scene froze as she realized what had happened to Severus, each person waiting for their punishments. She looked around at them for another moment before remembering Remus Lupin's position as prefect. _

_"Mr. Lupin. You will help he carry this boy over to madam Pomfrey. The rest of you will stay where you are until he can get your head of houses to deal with you..." She glanced at the girl, who had her arms forced behind her back, her face sticky and red with tears. "Sylvestra, you will accompany us."_

* * *

A/N: sorry for the cliffie guys. I didn't want to make the chapter too long. The new one will be up wicked soon, I promise.


	7. Planting Seeds

**Have Faith**

Part seven:

**Planting Seeds**

_-------_

_Sylvestra_

_They nearly ran up to the hospital wing after Madam Hooch did a rather sloppy and unprofessional healing spell. It merely slowed the flow of blood, pitted up against a much more powerful spell. Madam Pomfrey nearly shrieked when she saw the boy. They carried him over to a cot nearby. Sylvestra not so much sat as collapsed onto the bed next to his, her eyes red and puffy and her cheeks dashed with salt from her tears. As Madam Hooch drew Madam Pomfrey aside, she heard a creak, and felt the presence of someone sliding next to her on the cot._

_Remus Lupin wrapped an arm comfortingly around her shoulder, gazing at the deep gash in the now unconscious Snape's chest. Sylvestra spluttered and hiccupped. Glad for a shoulder to lean onto, she wrapped her arms around Remus' waist, hiding her face in his vest._

_"He'll be alright..." He muttered, rubbing her back, "Don't worry Sylvestra...He'll be alright...What were you two fighting about, anyway?" He asked, trying to distract her from the mangled body in front of them._

_"We were fighting-_hic_-about...about...Oh Remus" She said collapsing into tears again. "Don't get mad at me!"_

_Remus looked down, startled. "Mad? Why would I get mad at you?"_

_"I know about it-_hic_- about...James calls it your 'furry little problem'...and I know why you call each other Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs..."_

_Remus was stone-faced. He looked down at her, the shadows playing over the scars on his face, the arms wrapped around her shoulders going slightly limp. "The...furry...?"_

_"I haven't told a-_hic_-soul! I promise! Promise me you won't tell anyone else-_hic_- my secret..."_

_Remus shook his head, still bewildered. "No I...No I won't...Tell what?"_

_Sylvestra leaned up and whispered in his ear. Remus' eyes widened, and he looked down at her incredulously, then something purely odd happened. Their eyes locked; her deep azure and his unearthly gold. They seemed to linger there for hours, days, even weeks, before she finally tore hers away to wipe her eyes dry again, using an already drenched sleeve cuff. They were both blushing heavily._

_"An-another...?" He whispered, suddenly aware of the very horse-like shape of her eyes, her long neck, and the way her hair fell in front of her eyes almost like a forelock. Her gangly limbs now very obviously resembled that of a colt's._

_She nodded, burying herself in the folds of his clothing again, every once in a while peeking out to look at Severus as Madam Pomfrey went and left, and as people who had come to visit others stood by either scowling at, or laughing at him. With every visitor who stopped by, Sylvestra felt her rage rising. She wanted to shout at them not to look at Severus that way, and that she'd like to see them with a bloody 'X' branded across their chest. A few times she even rose up out of her seat, ready to defend her best friend if need be, but each time Lupin pulled her back into his embrace._

_"Just think this: If they knew what lies under those bandages, they'd respect him. Word will get out soon what's happened. Wormtail's never been known to keep his mouth shut for long." He whispered, smiling at her encouragingly._

_-------_

_Remus had to go back to class and Sylvestra was excused to explain what had happened. 50 points had been taken from both Ravenclaw and Gryffindor, while Slytherin had only 20 points taken. When Sylvestra was allowed free to go, it was dinner time. She had also received a detention, but that was to be spent assisting madam Pomfrey in the hospital wing, so Sylvestra didn't mind at all. During dinner, in which she ate very little, she listened intently as people retold the story. Remus was right, Wormtail hadn't kept his mouth shut, but his version of the story was much more successful at villainizing Snape than it was Sirius._

_Detention creeped by, and as Sylvestra cleaned bed pans and administered potions to the sickly, her eyes remained on one person; Severus Snape, who sat slumbering, sometimes still, but mostly restless, either the pain or something deeper frightening him into a fitful sleep._

_ Madam Pomfrey had said that the spell was hard-pressed to let the wounds heal completely. She had got it to stop bleeding all together, but she was having trouble replacing the flesh, so the bandages would remain as long as his bones remained bare. They were reluctant to administer anything to soothe the pain, because the magic done on him originally by Sirius was still lingering, and they didn't know how it would react with any sort of potion._

_Late that evening, as Sylvestra was finishing up, she caught a glimpse of a male figure drinking a potion, Madam Pomfrey hovering over him worriedly._

_She wandered over to the door way, and lingered there as Remus swallowed the last of the wolfsbane. He sighed with relief and clasped Madam Pomfrey's hand, saying something along the lines of 'thank you' before he straightened, his eye catching the welcoming red hair as it disappeared behind the doorway._

_Sylvestra stood there silent. She was not afraid that Remus would know she was there, but if Madam Pomfrey thought she knew about his 'furry little problem', she would be in trouble. The dusty brown haired boy poked his head around the door, grinning when he saw Sylvestra there, still looking pale, even for her severely Irish self._

_She smiled sheepishly and moved closer to him as he called back to Madam Pomfrey, saying he'd only be a minute, that he wanted to check on Severus for a moment. He smiled comfortingly down at her, and for the second time that day, their eyes locked._

_She blushed and stammered something incomprehensible. Remus' chuckled, stepping closer to her. _

_"What was that?"_

_"I er...Said I wanted to thank you for everything...you know...for earlier...for staying with me and...Making sure I didn't punch anyone..." She said, rubbing the back of her neck and turning a beautiful shade of fuchsia._

_He smiled, putting a hand on her arm, finding it incredibly hard to break away from her eyes. In fact, it was almost as hard as subduing the warm, cozy fire rising in his stomach._

_"It's nothing you should have to thank me for. Any decent human being would've done it."_

_There was a long pause, in which, for the first time that entire day, the horrific image of a torn up Severus flitted out of her mind. She felt that as long as Remus there, everything was going to be alright. Everyone would be safe._

_"Why've you gone and gave your secret away? Taking wolfsbane...you never used it before."_

_The silence that ensued told Sylvestra that her question had provoked some particularly unfriendly feelings in the Gryffindor, but after a moment he smiled and shrugged._

_"Sirius and I...That is to say, Sirius _James_ and I...Got in a fight. It didn't end all too well, so I don't think they'll be joining me in my usual romp through the shrieking shack," he said with a hint of sarcasm._

_"Well, I could always..." But then Sylvestra trailed away. No, that was too bold a step, asking to accompany him in animagus form... "Well...What were you guys fighting about anyway? Severus I imagine..." She said, leaning forward and tilting her head slightly to the side in an inquisitive manor. _

_Remus forced his eyes away, this time he was the one turning a magnificent pinkish shade. He stared down at his feet, not able to keep the nervous little smile off his face._

_"Well yes a tad...but mostly about you. Sirius hates you almost as much as he hates Severus," He said, glancing up at her and wincing as their eyes locked again, not able to pry himself away. Apparently this was the effect she had on most people, because she did not seem perturbed by the staring. "He reckons that your just some 'slimy kiss ass girl' who can't become friends with anyone...so you became friends with...well...the kid with _no_ friends."_

_When Remus said this, she felt a boiling hatred towards Sirius. From the look on Remus' face, he wasn't too happy either. She felt a sudden bond towards Remus that she felt was slightly familiar. After thinking a moment, she realized that this was how she had imagined Severus when she had first come to Hogwarts; how he accepted her, how he sat with her trough bouts of emotion, and most of all, how he stood up for her. Like Severus...Does that mean that I like him like Severus? She thought._

_"Wow, uh...thank you for standing up for me," she said, breathless. She brushed her hand against his to see Remus' reaction._

_The warm cozy feeling Remus had been feeling up until then exploded into a bonfire, enveloping his entire chest, the steam rising into his face. There was something about this girl that reminded him of the good side of Sirius. She was confident and cheerful, although, like Severus, she was a social outcast. He admired the amount of courage she had._

_Slowly he came to realize that although she reminded him of someone, it wasn't Sirius, it was Lily. Lily, the girl who had been for him when no one else had. It was because Lily sympathized with him that James had become friends with him anyways, and he had never really shared in his friends humor anyways. Now here was a girl that was so like lily, but yet so different from anyone he ever felt. Could that mean...that...that what he felt for this girl was what he felt for Lily?_

_Sylvestra was surprised but satisfied when Remus grabbed hold of her hands, pulling them up to his chest._

_"I wouldn't think of doing otherwise..." He said softly, smiling._

_Then, very carefully, very slowly, as if any sudden movement might break the spell they were in, Sylvestra stood up on her toes, leaning forward to plant a kiss firmly on Remus' waiting lips. It was quick and relatively painless, considering both were unsure whether they even fancied each other or not, and Sylvestra was sure she caught a flicker of laughter in Remus' eyes as she pulled away._

_Severus had awoken to the sound of Remus' voice. He had watched quietly as the two moved closer, completely unaware of what they were about to do. Honestly, who would imagine Sylvestra would do such a treacherous thing as to go behind his back with Remus Lupin. But his eyes widened and he sat bolt upright in bed, his fists clenched so tight around the bed sheets that his knuckles were as white as bone. The pain gushing throughout his body paled in comparison to the anger he felt. _

_At first, in denial, he had checked thoroughly above their heads, in case a house elf had forgotten to take down a stray sprig of mistletoe, but no. They were kissing, and it had not been invoked by an outside force. What he heard next made Severus so angry that it was a wonder they could not here him gritting his teeth from across the length of the wing._

_Remus cleared his throat, trying to make his voice sound smooth and capable as he said "There's a Hogsmeade trip two weeks from now...you know, for Valentine's Day. Well, if you're not going with anyone else..." He trailed off, smiling sheepishly. "Well, you know what I mean._

_Sylvestra squeezed his hand excitedly, so happy she planted another kiss on a scarred cheek, turning his flushed face into an even deeper shade of scarlet._

_"Of course! I'd love to go with you...well... as long as Sirius and James won't be there."_

_"Of course not. I'll make it a point to avoid them"_

_One thought swam through Severus' mind while he watched the two walk away, their hands entwined in a way that he just now realized he had always wanted their hands to be. It should be _his_ hand that she was holding, _his_ lips she was kissing! She should've been going to Hogsmeade with _him_! Not some mangy werewolf mutt!_

_The pair continued to walk away, unperturbed, despite the fact that Severus was staring daggers at their backs._

_"And perhaps, if it isn't too much to ask...I could accompany you to the shrieking shack?"_

_This received a slight hesitation from Remus, but finally he said "Sure, I don't see why not."_

_Severus threw his pillow at the pitcher of water on his nightstand. It fell off shattered loudly, water flying everywhere. He dived back onto his covers and pretended to be asleep as Madam Pomfrey came rushing over._


End file.
